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jamaica...

Beautiful island, wonderful people. A piece of my heart will always be in Jamaica.

I'm glad I waited a few days to really think about it and to process everything. The last time I went was 2003, my senior year of high school. I've loved the island and its people from the first time I went, so I was excited to go back. I knew that this trip would be very different from the ones I had been on in high school for a few reasons: 1) I was going as a leader this time, 2) the leadership of the student ministries was different, 3) the high schoolers were different (obviously), and 4) I knew that the trip had been different the last few years. Because of all these things, I wasn't quite sure what to expect, but I was still excited.

Preparing for the trip was great -- it didn't take too long, I fit everything in my suitcase (which is really unusual for me -- I like to prepare for everything), and I was 10 pounds under. I couldn't believe it -- this has never happened to me before. In fact, most trips I go on require a late night of packing and repacking a few times at least, followed by a breakdown because I don't know what I'm going to do and it just doesn't feel worth it, and then finally a solution when I think I can't take it anymore. So I guess I should have known that it was all too easy, because when I got to the airport, I was overweight and had to unpack some things. This made my carry-on rather large and cumbersome. Oh well. I so admire girls who can pack lightly.

The first part of the trip was a little difficult for me. I'll admit, I was suffering from the "this is so different from the way it was done in the past" disease. Along with that, I was feeling a little that the trip wasn't really for me -- it was really for the high schoolers who were there and I was just along for the ride. I'm not sure what I was thinking, but that's where my mind was in the beginning. The first disease was hard to get past because I kept seeing places that would remind me of previous trips. I think it was sometime on Sunday when the cure for the latter began and on Monday night when a conversation completely cured me of both. Throughout the first part of the week, I was stressing over some things we used to do in high school (really intense sharing times, lots of prayer everywhere we went, and a lot of praise and worship songs, among other things). I really felt like something was missing without all of this. Sunday came and was our VBS kickoff day. Lots of kids came and I was a little hesitant at first about connecting with any kids from the community. Should I? Shouldn't I? What would happen if I did or didn't? Will there be any kids that I can connect with? But there were kids that came out of nowhere to hang out with. Problem solved. Plus, I'm not sure I would have been able to live with myself if I tried to keep my distance from them. I love them too much. The complete cure came Monday night. During a conversation about some things, the statement was made that leaders have to be leaders in every way -- spiritually, mentally, relationally, physically. If we're not, we can't expect the students we lead to step up when the time is right. That night, I decided that was right and that's what I was going to do. My Beth Moore study had a lot to do with all of this, too (Stepping Up, go do it). Anyway, that night I decided I was going to be there in Jamaica in 2008, where God put me, instead of in Jamaica 5 years ago. I also decided to step up and lead the bus to the schools in prayer every day. Nothing happens without prayer, and I felt we needed some group
unity with prayer before we did anything in the day.

Once those issues got out of the way, it was incredible. One little change in mindset can do wonders.

Some things I learned/ fun things:
**I got to know some of the other girls from student ministries on this trip that I had seen before but never had the opportunity to get to know. They are amazing girls, and I feel that my trip was even more blessed because I got to know them. New friends. :)
**I think God really showed me more about what it means to be a leader, especially a leader of students. I must be following God with everything I have at all times (which is true anyway, but especially so if you're in a position to lead others). My every action is potentially being watched and modeled. It is a privilege and a blessing to be given the opportunity to lead, but it is also a tremendous responsibility. If I'm not being a leader that people can look up to, what business do I have leading? How can I expect my students to follow God closely with everything they have if I'm not doing that myself? And....I definitely don't have it all together or figured out. But I'm in that process.
**As much as I love going on mission trips, working in orphanages, and working with the "least of these," I can do that right here where I am, in Dallas, Ga. There are families in need in my own backyard (in my own classroom). How often do I overlook those in need that are so close to me? A sad revelation, but also a challenging one. The "least of these" are waiting for me here, where I am right now.
**I made two new, precious friends: Camelia, and a little girl whose name I can't remember, but I love them. Camelia caught me by surprise one day at VBS. She just walked right up to me like she new me, and that was that. My other friend was in first grade and she was simply wonderful. Both sweet, refreshing, beautiful girls who have a place in my heart.











**I have the most amazing people in my jgroup. I loved watching them all serve God and love people this week. It was simply incredible to see their hearts, watch them stretch themselves, and learn from them. I'm so glad I was able to get to know them in that setting, and I'm so blessed that I get to see them every week.


God is so good....

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