Skip to main content

so many....

thoughts in my head and feelings in my heart, that is...
oh, so many...

i've tried for a few weeks to be able to put words to them, to share with y'all and such, but i can't put the right words with them to make them coherent. there are, in fact, a few unfinished blogs sitting around waiting to be published, but it never seems quite right to post them. like they aren't ready. or i'm not ready. either way, they sit, unfinished, unpublished.

and i guess that means i'm still sifting through all the thoughts and feelings, deciphering what they mean, trying to make sense of them to myself.

so i sit. and wait. and think. and sit, wait and think some more. and some more.

and i have no idea where all this sitting and waiting and thinking is going to take me.

but i guess that's ok.


"have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. and the point is to live everything. live the questions now. perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer."
rainer maria rilke

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

happy new year! and....a quarter of a century

happy new year, my friends! i hope you celebrated in a fun way and were with people you love :) i was able to see some friends i never get to see new year's eve...and then was back at my parents' house by around 10:15...and was in bed by 11:30.... i did not stay awake to welcome in 2010, but i'm ok with that :) in other news, i'll be a quarter of a century old in a week. 25... i'm not one to freak out about my age (at least not yet) but 25 is a good year, i think. and in honor of my turning 25, i've decided to make lists of 25. because it'll be fun, and who doesn't love a good list? and because i spent yesterday traveling, the first list is a travel list, but is by no means complete or comprehensive....there's no way i could make a full list of everywhere i've been or would like to go.... so, enjoy!! 25 places i've traveled or would like to travel (red = where i've been, blue = where i'd like to go) 1. new orleans,

confidence in uncertainty

don't we all wish we had that? when we have no idea what is coming or where God is leading or what we are supposed to do, wouldn't it be nice if we felt confidence and peace during the uncertain times in our lives? over the last couple of months, i've really been wrestling with some uncertainties. about everything. who i am. what i'm meant to do. where i'm supposed to be. who God is, and says He is. who God says i am. the path God says for me to follow. asking and struggling. wondering and fighting. crying and laughing. understanding and then being lost in confusion. experiencing peace and then being overwhelmed by worry. but finally, there is a bit of an end. because i've made a decision. one that my soul made a long time before my head, i believe. a decision to follow. to trust. to be uncertain. to leave baltimore . looking at it through my eyes, i can't say that it really makes sense. i have a family here. abounding opportunities t

A Break to Listen

If you aren’t aware, there’s a bit of the unknown in my life right now.   Because of this place I’m in – out of necessity, really – I’ve been asking myself (and God) a lot of questions about purposes, dreams, places, and who I am. That last one seems to be cropping up a lot lately. And it is that question which has brought me here today. Last week I was talking with a friend about my recent trip to Chicago. Just to be clear, here’s how that trip happened: I’m in a Facebook group with a bunch of women from all over the country. One of them – who I had never met – posted about this conference (the Justice Conference) her organization was taking a group of women to, and there were some open spots. I emailed her, said yes, and booked a plane to Chicago…where I was picked up by another girl driving in from Michigan and then spent the weekend learning and loving and adventuring with 9 other women from different states whom I had also never met before. When I was leaving and my paren