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busy, busy

it's the end of the school year. that means a lot of stuff to do. finish a movie, fill out middle school paperwork, grade a lot of papers, 5th grade graduation things, field day, packing up a classroom, etc.
outside of school, it's much of the same. things are winding down for the summer, but there is still a lot to do....friends moving away, friends coming home, end of the year celebrations....

such business leaves little free time and i find myself wishing to be able to sleep in on a weekday. however, i know that when school lets out, i'll be bored in about 2 days. left with a lot of time to think. and i've been trying to avoid thinking too much lately. i hate making decisions, and i have some big decisions i'm going to have to make soon.

except that, as i write this, i realize that i really don't have to make the big decisions. all i have to do is say yes. God makes the decision, i just have to follow. i guess my decision is to listen and obey. sometimes that's just as hard. it shouldn't be, because God is who He is, but sometimes it's just difficult. especially when it just doesn't appear that God is anywhere near you. ever had that feeling? not too fun.

but today in church, Brian and Amy (our pastor and his wife) talked about God's faithfulness through the lives of 3 mothers in the Bible. one quote they used said something about how God often does His best work when it feels like He isn't anywhere to be found. i like that. i don't know what God is doing in my life right now. every now and then, i think maybe i can see His hand a little bit, but mostly, right now, it feels as though He isn't there. i know He is, because He says He is. feelings, though, often rule over logic in my life. such a girl :)

anyway, i write all this only because the only people reading are people who know me...and i trust you. please pray that i'll listen to God and willingly follow where He leads -- that I won't avoid thinking about it, but instead embrace the journey God has me on.

i love each of you....let me know if i can pray for you in anyway...

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